Lost & Confused

Remembering my first year with such hopes of becoming a doctor in Egypt, oh those hopeful faces in a land full of surprises, where you can't know what will happen next. And yet, I was so positive in everything. Positive in becoming a doctor, positive to endure those awkward and torturing experiences with my friends while my family is a thousand miles away.

And now, I'm in Malaysia again, with now almost finishing half my third year, still hopeful, still motivated and yet still lost & confused.

I just don't know what to do in my life, what are my next plans, what will I do after this degree. I just could not imagine the horror after getting my degree, finally establishing myself, connecting with other grown-ups in this messed up world.

Living in a grown-up world with other adults, carrying responsibilities, surviving a day just to wake up to watch another day.

It's just that, I do have my 5-year old plan, but sometimes I do wish that my plan does include any life outside my medical career. Still, how do I get out from my medical life if my life revolves around medical?

Mood: sometimes in doubt in my life, about everything.

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